Friday, January 27, 2006

Purposeless ranting today. No reviews.

Current status: Yawning... It's been a long day's night... Sheesh... School is nasty...
Currently listening to: Hammerfall - Hearts on fire. Repetitive as hell... Lyrics so-and-so... But damn, it's so hot-blooded~!
Quote of the day: "If I'm gonna die, I'm gonna be glad I met you" - Why would you wanna know where it's from? :P
Well, today I'm way too tired to write the review to the next GaoGaiGar Final episode... I'll just add this entry for the hell of it. NOT!


Today, I had to go to a Latin contest, THEN have a Biology test. A deadly combo that goes well only with a hidden bottle of vodka, to keep you awake... At any rate, the Latin contest itself was simple as hell. I can't complain, I finished it in half the time, and I'm pretty much confident I qualified for the next phase. I wanna get a national prize this year... Or at least reach national phase. I love these little field trips. FREE FOOD.

Biology was hell on Earth. That stupid test ought've ruined my morale for good, and it did, despite the fact that I copied from my deskmate. I know this won't end well... Oh, the heck, I'll pass anyway, considering I already have a 9/10.

The big thing is that I'm finally glad to have gone over a very damn period of my life. Last year, I was completely ruined by my grandma's illness and by my first love and first failure. I was damn stupid back then, and came up with the corniest way to confess to a girl that I liked her... It's true that she liked the other boy in the class already, and I knew it... I believed in the power of miracle and hoped that that was all a method to make me try harder. Tough luck, she was more simple-minded than I had thought... Poet(esse)s are too straightforward for my taste...
Last week precisely, I tried to tell a girl I like her the second time... NO, it's not the same girl... Jeez, I'm not completely stupid, y'know... At any rate, as usual, I planned it, replies included. The result was obvious: nothing worked out as expected. I wasn't able to do more than a mumble meaning the first letter of "I like you" in Romanian. In short, she might have caught on, but I tried after classes, and bloody hell, as I expected, this time, I was able to do it spontaneously, no planning included. The reply was of course negative... The reason different. While the other girl said the humongous load of bull that she had hoped I wasn't actually in love with her (and people call me feelingless?), this one had another reason, which I accepted quicklier: she said I didn't know her enough, and that she didn't want me to be hurt or something, and she obviously was concerned I'd give her a cold look and stay away from her for the rest of my days (which I would've done if she'd done the same crap the other did), and actually told me not to get angry, to which I plainly answered that I'm not angry, and that I'm perfectly fine. Later on, I realized at last that the failed love I had beared for the first girl, even though now dead (the love, not her, unfortunately :P), I had for a long time the obsession to get a better girlfriend than her. It seems that what the second girl told me (that thing that was the previous quote of the day) showed me that friendship matters more. A kiss or a caress won't help you. If your lover is all "yes, honey", you've got nothing. One needs the iron hand of a friend who tells you: you numbskull, you did it wrong!, not some faint-hearted poet who compares your eyebrows to endless waves of lovable love of lovely love, or who starts counting seconds until she sees you...

Today (actually, that'd be yesterday), a third girl (who was, say, my second option in case my most recent declaration failed. Of course, if she reads this, I'm screwed... >_<), who most obviously has a boyfriend, told me something, perhaps under the influence of illness, which is written at the Quote of the Day section. That thing was extremely interesting to hear. It seems that sounded more natural than a "I like you" or a "You're cute/funny". This is something of greater deepness. One can love someone, but feel regrets if we failed. However, to say something like this means that I've become a nice guy. Some idiot told me that the way to a girl's heart is badassness and not helping them. Frankly, if Casanova succeeded, why couldn't I? I don't think my grandpa told my grandma to scram when they were young. Really... Being nice is the best thing to do. The least you'll get is some nice info on someone else or on that speciffic person.

Ok, I think I've said a lot of crap today. Dunno what happened to me... I'll go draw a moustache on that guy's picture? Nah, perhaps that first girl's reading this. I think she forgot I even had a blog. I'll draw that moustache, for the hell of it. :D

Signing off for today, the Lion of Genesis~!

No comments: